We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules: Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
1. Breasts are for looking at and that is why we do it. Don't try to change that
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Saturday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
JUST SAY IT!
1. 'Yes' and 'No' are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials
1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we
1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine, really
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as:
Sex,
Sport, or
Cars
1. You have enough clothes
1. You have too many shoes
1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.
1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping.
Regel nummer 1 dat vind ik de beste ;D
LOL
Zelf vond ik nummer 1 het beste, maar jou nummer 1 Mehn is ook aanvaardbaar.
Citaat van: Boba Fett op 21-10-2004 16:56:35
Woaaaahhhh..... (http://www.moelands.com/smilies/rofl.gif) (http://www.moelands.com/smilies/rofl.gif)
En ja, nummer een is héél erg waar!
Ik ben erg benieuwd naar een reactie van Ingrid over deze stellingen... ;)
En die van jouw Schoonmoeder <megalol>
Citaat van: Boba Fett op 21-10-2004 16:56:35
Ik ben erg benieuwd naar een reactie van Ingrid over deze stellingen... ;)
Ingrid kennende is ze het er helemaal mee eens ;)
"The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth!" ;D
Just my humble 2cts,
Frans
En daarmee is nummer 1 toch wel heel erg hilarisch leuk en waar ;D
Citaat van: Frans_Harkema op 21-10-2004 20:51:06
"The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth!" ;D
gaan we ze nu ook al trut noemen?
Ik dacht trouwens , dat regel 1 al ingeburgerdt was. ;)
--edit--
tekst even uit quotevak gehaald
--edit--
http://www.nu.nl/opmerkelijk/2267489/boze-weduwe-met-urn-huisarts.html
Huh? Heb je een topic uit 2004 opgegraven? :eusa_shifty:
Citaat van: elianmars op 12-06-2010 11:31:01
Huh? Heb je een topic uit 2004 opgegraven? :eusa_shifty:
Lijkt er wel op... :eusa_shifty:
Zoekfunctie gebruikt om het Humor!-topic te zoeken, deze gevonden en gepost. :eusa_wall:
Je kan je ook afvragen waarom we een topic " Humor" en een topic "Humor!" hebben. ::)
Mods break
en daarom gaan we daar verder: http://www.volvo850forum.nl/index.php/topic,15798.0/topicseen.html